她說

她靜悄悄地來過 她慢慢帶走沉默
只是最後的承諾 還是沒有帶走了寂寞
我們愛的沒有錯 只是美麗的獨守太折磨
她說無所謂 只要能在夜裡翻來覆去的時候有寄託
等不到天黑 煙火不會太完美
回憶燒成灰 還是等不到結尾
她曾說的無所謂 我怕一天一天被摧毀
等不到天黑 不敢凋謝的花蕾
綠葉在跟隨 放開刺痛的滋味
今後不再怕天明 我想只是害怕清醒

such a nice song.

I'm Back

Its been a year that i didn't update my blog and now I'm back. Yesterday is my last paper for the degree exam, finally I had ended my degree studies for 1 and half year. There are two feeling that i having now, happy and sad. Happy is because, i do not need to take any exam anymore (maybe), and all my book can throw away. haha... Yet I feel so sad due to i going to separate with my classmate. Today is the farewell for us and Mr Lee had joined us too. Today schedule is totally full. 1st plan is to go k, then we went to penang bowl to bowl. Mr Lee might be very happy because play bowling is his hobby. After bowl, we went to Tambun and eat. 20 dec is lung's birthday, because of he going to back Sarawak at 17, so we plan take a early celebrate with him. beh and da ge went to buy a cake and we celebrate with him at iz's house. We all stay at iz's house and play games. Unfortunately, my mum is not allow me to overnight at there, so he sent me back and go back iz's house again. :'( sigh ...

It been a long time that all of us not play together since the Langkawi trip. Because we all rushing for our coursework and busy for the exam preparation for few months. Finally, its end. I very appreciate that the time we study together, do coursework, play, eat, joke, the time we shoot tat yeh.. hahaha..It's fun that make joke with you all. Thank you all for give me such a good memories. Another 6 hours, iz and janis will fly to singapore for looking the job and also start their honeymoon. Same to my dear, he will go to singapore at 2mrw night. And I will miss them much. For others classmate, when we free, then we go out yam cha. And lung, i will wait u back, waiting for your 'gam puak' ya. haha...

Lastly, all the best to my friends. I love you guys. Hope to see you all soon.

我是失败者

最近"对不起"这三个字一直挂在我嘴边,对他说了无数的"对不起"...我,是个失败者. 对他,我的家人,我的朋友,我的学业,我始终还是个失败者.面对他,我真的不懂怎么控制好我自己的情绪,
我常答应他的事,到现在我还是办不到.因为我的话,伤了他的心,我知道他不怪我,不过我知道他的心一定很不好受.对不起!除了"对不起",还是"对不起""..对不起,因为我,让你很难过,因为我,让你累了!
我该怎样???就连我自己都不晓得该如何去改变,我真不懂该如何去面对他.我只能说,我是一个彻底的失败者!!!

2 oct 2009

happy birthday to my dear...

1 oct 2009

same as usually i wake at 7.30 today ,then waiting him to fetch me go to find johan and tim and ask for help. today is cw due date,until now my report still not yet finish.i was worried about it...after fetch johan and tim we went to mr.pot and continue our cw at there. Then around 1pm we went for our class, luckily pn rosmah know that we all rushing our cw at that moment and she had decided to let us do our cw cos she know we wont concentrate if she having class. Until 5pm, i still left 2 sections of the report not yet complete. So,we had decided go to johan's working place and continue our report. me,him,tim,jun and bear also at there...until 9pm,johan was close the shop,at that moment we had completed our report yet me,him and jun still not yet upload our cw to the uk site. So, we went to johan's hostel and upload the cw. When we upload, suddenly it said server not found, i was started nervous ...and we called ms koo if the server is down then we cant upload the cw then what can we do,she asked us to call ms joanne. but luckily...after few mins our cw was successfully upload. already 10.20pm,then me,him,johan and tim went to food court opposite pcghs there having our dinner. After dinner he drop them bk to their hostel then dropped me. I reach home at 11.20, and he need to take abt 30 mins to reach home..so i was wish he can reach b4 12 bcos tonight after 12am is his birthday....luckily i still can wish him on time...happy birthday dear! last, i want to thank ms koo,johan,tim and him that helping me a lot in my cw.thanks you all!!!

30 Sept 2009

今天一早，我和他去了mcd继续做cw，下午就去上课了。。老师今天没上课，就帮我们检查我们的cw。。。看见他那么努力地问老师，一来我也很开心，因为我感觉到他是会紧张他的cw的，二来我觉得很压力，因为到了今天我还是对cw没有太深入的了解。他问完后，我就立刻去问老师，老师说她没idea怎样帮我改，因为怕改了后，我和他的会是很像，担心marker 改了后说我们俩是copy对方的。那时的我，压力又增了。。。问完后，我，他，johan,tim 一起去吃晚餐了。回到家，一直在想report该怎么写，想着想着，越想就越压力。。。哭了。。一直想不开。。幸亏那时有君和他劝我，给我鼓励，我才振作起来。谢谢你们！过后就继续开工直到深夜两点，终于顶不住了，就去睡了。

压力

很久都没更新了，最近变得很懒惰，无论什么事都一样。。。这几天无论做什么事，心里总是‘闷闷’的，感觉很压力。。。在家人，他，朋友面前，我只能掩饰我闷闷的心情。离coursework要交的时间就只剩三天，我又没头绪该怎么做，到了今天我还没完成，那股压力直压着我，无法呼吸，就连睡都睡不好。。。我知道不只是我有压力，他也一样。。他说不知道该怎样做，就选择了逃避，一天一天地过去了，我一直都在担心他到底能不能完成。我的压力又增了一倍，很辛苦。。昨晚跟他谈了后，他说他会做，到了现在还是没醒。。。难道他就想一直逃避吗？？？我真的很想做我的事，不想要再去理他，但。。。我知道我帮不了他，唯有能做的就是一直催他要做coursework，给他鼓励。其实我真的很想改变他，改变他的生活，很想骂醒他。。不过我还是没做到。。。感觉到很累。。。很累。。。希望可以快点完成我的coursework，让我好好地休息一下。